Flexibility

Flexibility. 1.Willing or disposed to yield. 2. Susceptible of modification or change; adaptable.

I've always thought I was flexible. As someone who's traveled the world and been fortunate enough to do so many cool things, I thought I had the ability to adapt to different circumstances. What I've just discovered is although I may be able to adapt to different circumstances, my brain is very rigid when it comes to personal development.

If I set goals for myself, I'm really hard on myself and the slightest change of circumstance will have me thrown off course. For example, let's say I need to be in bed by 9pm so I can wake up at 4am to do my exercise, meditation, morning writing, Tundruk, eat well and get dressed by the time 9am comes around. If something comes up (like last night having to take the lovely Dahlia von Danger to jail at 10pm), it literally mind rapes me into feeling like I can't do all of the things I planned. I will end up making excuses and have to start all over on a Monday. And yes...I always have to start any plans on a Monday or it doesn't feel right.

That's stupid, right? My goal is to be more flexible. I don't need to beat my self up cause I woke up at 7am instead of 4am. If I don't get my exercise in before 9pm, I can still do it later, or just skip a day. The world will not end, and I don't have to wait till the top of the week to start on my goals. I need to be able to go with the current and breeze through life with no problems. Life always throws curve balls. Expect the unexpected and adapt. Don't be sturdy in your ways.


So DAHLIA von DANGER, a model/feature dancer I represent had to turn herself into the police last night. It was bananas. The lucky little devil ended up getting out on a signature bond and it just reminded me of the first time I went to jail at 19 years old. I actually pulled out some jail house poetry and writings to share with y'all when I was in the hole...
                                   
                                 She quietly schemes
                                 Eyes pulled tight into slits
                                 Lip curled slightly to one corner
                                 Her smirk speaking volumes
                                 If anyone would listen
                                 She roars violently
                                 Under her demure shell
                                 Ready to bite
                                 She takes her time eating
                                 She's waiting for the vultures
                                 To Swoop again
                                 She's seething
                                 Each disrespectful action makes her stronger
                                 She's almost at invisible
                                 They used to be able to see her every move
                                 But the tables have turned
                                 She's been paying attention
                                 While they were seeking attention
                                 She now knows
                                 And will use it to her advantage
                                 Making each one snivel and regret
                                 Swoop
                                 They took her milk
                                 Swoop Swoop
                                 There goes her bread
                                 She knows time by counting her steadheart beat
                                 The bell will sound in 5 minutes
                                 Her heartbeat quickens
                                 She loses time
                                 All is lost
                                 She'll time it right next time.


.....Don't ask. Jail had me tripping! I had two pieces of paper and a pencil I would sharpen with my teeth, no lie. When there was no room left on the papers, I thought I would die! I was only allowed out of my cell for an hour a day and wasn't allowed to read or anything. HELL on EARTH! Never again...(or should I be flexible). I don't know...everyone ain't Mandela!